Confessions of a Concussed Cyclist: “at the foot of this mountain, I only see clouds”

December 21, 2019

Sometimes I get stuck in these days of intense sadness where I feel extra fragile.  This is now my life but I did not sign up for this. I don’t know if I have it in me to keep fighting the brain injury battle.  

You were able to walk away that day with no consequences.  I have been stuck paying the price for your actions since. You were left with a Jen-sized dent in your door; I was left with a traumatic brain injury.  You drove home that night and had dinner with your family; I spent hours in the E.R. You went to work the next day; I lost my job. You tell people it was my fault (it’s always so easy to blame the cyclist); I suffer daily with PTSD.  You’ve gone about your life as if nothing happened; daily I have to deal with a post-concussion migraine and TBI symptoms. You got the dent in your door fixed; I found out my adrenal glands do not function due to the trauma of you hitting me with your SUV plus I gained a bunch of weight because my body is stuck in fight or flight mode.  Five years later and you don’t remember my name; five years later and new symptoms/complications continue to arise. You don’t remember what day it happened; August 19th haunts me. Your life has not changed; mine is forever turned upside down.