Confessions of a Concussed Cyclist: fatigue

Fatigue after a brain injury is one of the most common side-effects.  This is not surprising as EVERYTHING I now do takes more energy than it ever did when my brain was damage-free.  I’ve read in multiple places that the average person has about 15 hours worth of energy while a person with a brain injury has about 4 hours.  Things you once took for granted now zap your energy…taking a shower, grocery shopping, doing laundry, making a meal! It has taken me a long time to adjust to this fact and truth be told I still try to push the limits (even though I know there will be hell to pay).  

The fatigue I experience with a brain injury is unlike any other fatigue I’ve felt before.  I’ve been tired from pedaling 200 miles in one day. I’ve been tired from packing and moving.  I’ve been tired from not getting enough sleep. I’ve been tired from working one full-time job and one part-time job at the same time.  I’ve been tired from working full time and going to college full time. I’ve been tired from being a Special Education teacher at the end of the school year.  But nothing prepared me for this kind of fatigue.

The first two years after the crash I was able to keep up fairly well (relatively speaking) but it cost me dearly.  I dug into a reserve that I have not been able to replenish since.

I used to work full time, go to college full time, and still exercise everyday.  I used to clean my apartment, do my weeks worth of laundry, grocery shop, then go out with friends.  These are all things of the past now. I can do one thing, maybe two, but never three. I can work. I can exercise.  I can do laundry. But not all on the same day.

I still sleep on average 10-12 hours a night.  I often take a 1-3 hour nap during the day as well.  I get flak for this (much like many other things related to my brain injury) but it’s always from people that do not know how tiring this life is.  Despite the many hours I typically sleep in a 24 hour period, I am still exhausted all the time. It’s a tired that affects you down to your bones. It is a tired that no amount of sleep can fix. It’s a tired that makes you want to cry.  It’s a tired that makes even the simplest task seem like having to climb Mt. Everest. Being so tired affects my reasoning and thinking skills. It affects my emotions. I become more apt to make silly mistakes, stutter, bounce into things, etc.  It’s a tired that turns my already fragile brain into mush.

There is a lot I miss about my “old life” but having energy is definitely in the top 5.