Confession of a Tired, Concussed Cyclist

July 23, 2015

I met with my lawyer today…if you’ve ever had a settlement meeting with a lawyer, you know these can be stressful, overwhelming meetings. If you’ve ever met with a lawyer to discuss a settlement and you have a head injury, then you know these meetings can be stressful, overwhelming, and a form of exhausting torture! I try to not schedule meetings or doctor’s appointments on Mondays or Thursdays because those are my days to ride with the boys, but when your lawyer says “I’m free Thursday” you say “Great…works for me!”

Today is Thursday…today is a group ride day…today the weather was perfect, the route was great, the company was wonderful, my legs were ready to ride, but my brain had other plans. I’ve learned the hard way that when my brain is tired, I need to listen. I am still stubborn enough however to not let my head win all the time, so I struck off on a ride, knowing I’d end it early. A short ride is better than no ride…I have to keep reminding myself of that! See, when my head is tired I have trouble with judgment (I make bad decisions) and processing speed (I make bad decisions slowly). Add to it that the sun was setting, creating shadows on the road (this really messes with my head) and it was a potential recipe for disaster.

For those that do not know what my particular head injury is like (after all, they are all different), let me put it to you in terms that most average American’s can understand…”it’s like being drunk, but without the fun of drinking” (as quoted by my friend Brian). Words get slurred, memory is impaired, attention span is short, objects get in my way, bad decisions are made, etc. It’s not fun ever, but especially not fun when you’re on your bike and the only thing between you and a car going 50 MPH is a thin layer of lycra! So begrudgingly, I ended my ride early and came home. I try to always remind myself to be thankful that I can ride, again, a short ride is better than no ride, but some days…most days…I don’t want to settle for short. I want to ride like how my legs are accustomed; I just need to get my brain to join along.

I compromised today, I rode, but I respected my head screaming at me. I will go to bed soon and rest the tired noggin…after all, tomorrow morning I have to get up early, drive to Hanover, get shots in my head (for my migraine) and have cognitive therapy. If you’ve never had cognitive therapy before, it’s like meeting with a lawyer to discuss a settlement and you have a head injury…times 10!